I am who I am.
There is no shame in that even though I often feel ashamed.
I think differently than the so-called normal people. I know that no one IS normal. We all have our demons. Some, like mine, have staked claim to land and started building condominiums and invited all their friends. My head is a cluster fuck. That is on a good day!
I have gone through a bit of a rough patch these last few months. I changed roles at my place of employment, and it did not work out quite like I had hoped. I lost my father-in-law a lot more quickly than anyone had expected when we received the news his condition was terminal. And of course, there has been a global pandemic we all have been dealing with for over a year and a half now.
My marriage has its ups and downs. My kid is “finding her voice” at times when tempers are barely reigned in – and the usual struggles with ASD, insomnia, anxiety, depression, and dysphoria. I suppose that would be a good short introduction.
I have hit another rock bottom. My life feels out of control. I forgot what my dreams were. Fuck, I have forgotten how to dream. In knowing I am at a low point there is the piece of mind in knowing that a change of perspective a whole lot of focus in the right direction can make all the difference. It is here where I plan to chronicle it all.
My focus will be on physical, mental, and spiritual health. I strongly believe these three areas are inter-connected and directly impact what we perceive to be our quality of life. I have some ideas on where to start and plan to learn along the way. I will celebrate the successes and learn from the failures. It will truly be a journey in “Rebuilding Rados”, me.