I’m trying to tell myself it is okay to start over. It does not mean I am a failure or a bad person, it just means I lost focus because my intention was not strong enough. When I am trying to do something for a future reward yet trying my damnedest to live mindfully, it gets hard to stay on track.
I’m at a stage where I know deep down my life situations do not matter in my spiritual evolution. I know the past and future are thought forms and do not exist. I know that I am not my ego.
At the same time I want to enjoy my human experience.
I believe a better physical body will provide me with greater experiences. I believe modifications to my home will create more joy in the moment I experience them. I still get caught up in a world where the majority have different belief systems than I do.
Starting over means my foundation was not solid. I can’t build a sturdy house simply by nailing wooden boards together on the grass. I can’t rush into changes simply because I want the results more quickly. Time is part of the human experience. We can’t get what we desire immediately.
This morning I am pressing the “reset” button yet again in an effort to live my best life!